We are in the age of social gaming, where gamers can seamlessly connect with friends, family and even strangers while immersed in gameplay. The social aspect of gaming has become increasingly popular with children, especially during the Covid-19 pandemic. Games like Among Us and Roblox have emerged as go-to choices, enabling kids to hang out virtually with their friends (and even host virtual birthday parties!) while being physically apart. In this article, we look at the pros and cons to help you answer this question: should you let your child use chat in their online games?

Text chat is the most basic chat feature, where gamers can use text-based messages to communicate with each other. There may also be a ‘quick chat’ feature where gamers can send set phrases to another player (e.g., “Nice shot!” or “Watch out!”) with a simple click without typing. Another newer feature is the ‘ping system’, where players can communicate information by pointing their cursor on a specific object or location and pressing the ‘ping’ button (for example, to alert a teammate of an enemy’s location). Voice/video chat is another common chat feature which allows for real-time voice/video communication between gamers without interrupting gameplay. Besides in-game chat, players can also communicate outside the game environment via third party gaming-adjacent platforms like Discord,Steam and Twitch.

From your child’s perspective, incorporating chat into online gaming makes the experience more fun, immersive and enjoyable. However, apart from the entertainment value, there may be other tangible benefits to consider. For example, children may be able to enhance their social skills and develop genuine interpersonal relationships through chatting with like-minded individuals. To highlight another example, in popular Multiplayer Online Battle Arena (MOBA) games like Dota 2 or League of Legends, use of chat is essential for discussing and coordinating strategies between teammates — this type of engagement presents opportunities for children to learn effective communication skills and even develop conflict resolution techniques, which would ultimately contribute to their personal growth and development.

On the flip side, allowing your child to use chat potentially exposes them to a multitude of online risks, including phishing attacks and scams, bullying and harassment and exposure to inappropriate or harmful content (such as eating disorders, self-harm, suicide, violence etc.) Perhaps unsurprisingly, voice chat seems to fare worse than text chat in terms of toxicity — a recent survey of 1022 U.S. gamers found that a whopping 72% of voice chat users experience a toxic incident and the number of toxic incidents per voice chat user is 35% higher than text chat. It also found that the most common toxic incidents include “offensive names,” “annoyances,” “trolling” and “bullying.” Such toxic incidents not only spoil the gaming experience, but are also likely to have a direct and negative psychological impact on your child.

Use parental controls: In an ideal world, the default setting for in-game chat for children should be “OFF” and games should always obtain parental consent before voice or text chat is enabled for children. However, not all game developers adhere to this best practice and parents should pro-actively check that the appropriate settings are put in place. For example, in December 2022, Epic Games paid a settlement of $520 million over FTC allegations of privacy violations, which included enabling voice and text chat by default (amongst other things).
Don’t rely solely on moderation systems: A recent report by the NYU Stern Center for Business and Human Rights found that although gaming companies have made efforts to implement content moderation systems and technologies, most companies still lag behind in terms of adequately governing and mitigating abuse of their platforms. Parents can encourage their children to take the initiative to report instances of abuse or violations of the community guidelines to game administrators, rather than relying solely on AI bots or human moderators to identify and address such issues.
Education and empowerment: Parents should have open conversations with their children about how to stay safe while using chat in online gaming. Here are a few key messages that parents can encourage their child to remember:
Only talk to people that you know in real life, not strangers! Moreover, do not meet strangers in real life without your parent’s permission.
Do not disclose any personal information (e.g., full name, address, phone number etc.) or any other sensitive information.
Promptly inform your parents (or a trusted adult) when you feel uncomfortable with any interactions or behaviour you encounter. Make use of features like ‘blocking’ or ‘muting’ to avoid further interaction with players that you do not want to engage with.
Establish personal boundaries; you are fully empowered to say “no” to inappropriate discussions and requests, or uncomfortable situations.
Refrain from using vulgar or inappropriate language. Be kind, considerate and respectful to others; speak to others the way you wish to be spoken to!